Friday, July 10, 2026

MY BIRTHDAY MEAL - HOW WE STARTED AND HOW WE ENDED UP


Where do I start? The three of us - husband, son and I - set off at 2.30 p.m. We would have dearly loved our daughter-in-law to join us, but their working hours are different and d-in-l's day was overflowing until late evening.

We wanted to get to the restaurant early and we arrived at opening time, 3.00 p.m. We were all looking forward to a steak and loaded potato meal, having decided on this restaurant a week ago and already had checked out the menu.

As soon as we walked in, we were shown a large glass case of different cuts of steak that we could order, and it seemed we were expected to choose there and then. However, we said we would like to sit down and look at the menu first.

It all went downhill from there. We were shown our table, a booth, that was about four inches off the ground and the boys reminded me to make sure that I didn't climb down before they got there to help me. Yes, I promised, no problem and I was happy with the table but…

firstly, let me say we are not fussy, picky, snippety, customers, far from it and we have not had any kind of a problem with meal or staff at any of the special occasion restaurants, until now. Well, there was that one time 30 years ago, which came flooding back like a laser beam, but I won't go there, yet.

We all ordered the steak from this young man who firstly ignored the usual nicety of saying, “Hello I'm -----, welcome to -----, can I get you....."  I was closest to him, and he crowded me out by shoving his hair and his elbow into my face and asking the boys what their order was. I immediately started feeling anxious and claustrophobic. No exaggeration, the boys' eyes said it all and I never would make a good poker player. My expression spoke volumes. Lips pursed, eyes narrowing...

I was being totally shoved into a corner as they gave him their orders. Ignored me, no eye contact, with any of us actually. He presented a surly persona. Finally, still not looking up, he said brusquely, "And you?" Seeing my surprised look, Gregg jumped in and ordered for me. Surly guy left and the three of us looked at each other and looked in our waiter's direction, wondering what the heck was going on with him. Maybe he was having a bad day, but this was opening time and we were one of the first customers. Maybe something more than a bad day and you do wonder. Okay, we went on chatting and tried to enjoy ourselves but it was a strange start. 

He came back and put my coffee down in front of me without ceremony and left. I took one sip and it was like it had just come out of an icebox. I said to son take a sip of my coffee. He said it's ice cold and no, this was meant to be a hot cup of coffee, the heavy mug gave it away. 

The meal came and let's just say the thickness of the steaks were considerably a lot thinner and smaller in size than what we were shown in the display case. I've cooked steak, I know it doesn't cook down that small in size or as thin from the sizes we saw. I had ordered a small one and thought this was starting out to be a strange birthday meal. 

The potato with all the fixings that was so highly praised online, was cold. Son’s Mac and cheese that was cold too, not even luke warm. How's your potato I said to hubby. It's cold he said. 

Earlier we were presented with a tray of several pots of small side dishes to taste, so that we would have a better idea when choosing our side dishes. A good idea but all of it looked abysmal and tasted overcooked and mushy. Son also told us that our waiter came out with his thumb stuck in hubby's salad, something he remembered much later but in all the kerfuffle he forgot to tell his dad. Cue roll of eyes looking sideways when I heard that. 

We didn't say anything because we were still trying to figure things out. Totally puzzled by the waiter's continued surly attitude. He was being downright rude. I could feel my blood pressure rising. And that's unusual for me as I consider myself a person who is rarely ruffled. There have been times in my life when I have felt totally disrespected and those ruffles start to rise. Let's get to the cocktails. The Margarita I get once a year on my birthday gave me brain freeze and I was only taking a sip at a time. Birthday meal was definitely heading in a bad direction. 

I asked him to take the coffee away as it was cold and it was wasted space. I didn't say that last part, but literally there was no room on the table for wasted space. Did I want another he asked, which surprised me. No, thank you I said. I wasn't feeling very chatty.

Our son was looking at me really sympathetically because I had said 'I wouldn't mind so much but this is my birthday meal, and I've been looking forward to this for ages'. The bad poker-player face was out there for all to see. The bar was right next to our table, and I think the lady who was serving drinks may have heard my complaint because the next thing the manager came over and asked if everything was satisfactory. Did we complain? Of course not! By that time, I do what I usually do when I am upset, I clammed up and the boys thought it would be better just to get out of there, not bothering with a dessert. 

We all felt the service was atrocious, that this young man had a long way to go in his interactions with customers. I was watching him truly puzzled and noticed that when he went into the kitchen, which we were close enough to see, he had a big smile for a girl in there and was chatting to her for a bit. How sweet and yes, I may be a bit snarky! 

What we did do was get out of there as fast as we could. From start to finish the three of us agreed the service and food were awful. My two darlings thought that the guy was having a really bad day, but I told them it certainly didn't stop him from switching on the charm for that young girl, which I could see going on and they couldn't because their backs were to the kitchen. 

The check came and much later, son told us he actually gave him a decent tip. He said maybe he will think about that one. The boys laughed at me when I slid out of the booth in a "Get me out of here" sliding motion down to floor level. I couldn't wait to get out of the place. The whole experience was horrible! I kept hoping our waiter would get better, but he just gave us a steady does of worse and I was extremely disappointed.

Our son suggested we go over to Chateau de Chantilly which wasn't too far away. Bless him for suggesting that as it allowed us to decompress over a lovely cup of coffee and dessert and where, even though we don't interact with the staff that much as it is cafe-style, we can guarantee we will get a lovely smile and way better treatment. I personally was sick of the surly. 

I won't name the restaurant. Maybe we should have said something, but when all's said and done, we didn't want to be the catalyst for this young man losing his job. On reflection it felt like he needed a second chance from someone. 

I also don't understand how unappetizing, cold food can be served up when the place had just opened its doors and there was barely anyone in there. Maybe everyone behind the scenes was having a bad day, maybe something had happened. I'm giving them all the benefit of the doubt. 

With all that being said we ended up having a great pick-me-up-ending at our favorite little cafe, and enjoyed a coffee and dessert. Thank you son for suggesting it.

The boys teased me about the expression I had on my face when I left the first restaurant. They hadn't seen that expression in a long time. When I left the Chateau de Chantilly Cafe, frown had turned upside down and I was smiling. Different as night and day.   

Now, I do remember one other waiter who talked down his nose at me after I tried to order something that was way too gauche to be on the menu, literally scoffed at me, about 30 years ago! This incident brought it right back like a laser. We never went back to that restaurant and we're certainly not going back to this one. I have a long memory for people talking down their nose to me, where I feel totally disrespected. I avoid those people like the plague, and I have a memory like an elephant.

I took a few photos but will only share the ones from our bright, cheerful and sunny Chateau de Chantilly and to everyone there, I say a big thank you for being consistently good, from the staff to their pastries, to their coffee. I owe an even bigger thank you to our son for suggesting it. 

Let me just say, this was an unusual experience. We have never, in all these years, had a bad meal and terrible service like this one.

I passed this over to Gregg for a read and his response said, yes, that just about covers everything that happened, and we both actually had a bit of a chuckle. 

Onward and upward!

Thanks for listening to my moaning Minnie personality who thankfully rarely makes an appearance. Because I have always been a diary/journal writer since I was young, I want to remember everything, and I feel better for writing it all down. What would I have done differently? Not go out in the first place? Ha! 

How would you have handled it? I am really curious! We all handle awkward situations differently.

Have a great day everyone! 



Photos from Chateau de Chantilly Cafe on Wednesday, July 8th, 2026


Feeling better!



I like your Mickey Mouse shirt guy!




Gregg with his choice of coca cola, special design for 250 year celebration.


Here is a closer look with his choice of dessert, a sticky bun.


Son's choice of dessert, can't remember what this was called but it tasted good he said.


My choice, a brownie-like base with a big marshmallow on top, plus a sliver of chocolate and a little icing.


I found a quote just recently and I thought why not put it on here. Author unknown.

“Life can sometimes be like a bowl of soup and I am just the fork.”



And that's it for today's epistle!








74 comments:

  1. Oh NO, how horrible!!!!! And you all were so nice looking and polite, there was no reason for this! I'm afraid that when the manager asked about it, I would have had to tell him at least about how bad and cold the food was. So that it does not happen to others who come early. I am thinking you are so much more forgiving than I am. So I am proud of you!!! You handled it in such a humble and Christian way.

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    1. That’s very sweet of you Ginny, thank you :)

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  2. Oh gosh not a good birthday dinner at all.
    I would have requested a hot coffee, and same for the meal. I too don't complain but I would have if my meals were cold when put on the table, that's just not on at all for me Denise. Glad you found a nicer place to have a hot coffee and a lovely sweet to top the evening off with.

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    1. Thank you Margaret. As you say, at least we ended up on a good note :)

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  3. I am sorry your birthday dinner was such a disaster. If you feel like you need to vent, an online review is a great way to do it.

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  4. Sounds like, “How to ruin a birthday celebration, 101” taught by a master! I can’t even imagine going out for steak and loaded potatoes at three in the afternoon. That’s barely past lunchtime. We eat dinner between 6 and 7. As for how I would have handled it, at the first inkling of that kind of attitude, I would have left. I have done it before. Eating out in general is not my favourite activity. Far too many restaurants play music which a) I don’t like and b) is far too loud. Between the music and the general noise of people talking, waiters clanging trays, smarmy servers asking, “How is everything so far?”, loud people at the next table, soup slurpers, people who can’t make a point without waving their knife and fork like weapons……well you get the point. If I never were to eat in a restaurant again it would cause me no grief.

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    1. It was our one meal of the day, or supposed to be. I asked to go early because I don’t like crowds. For that it is a good time to go but obviously didn’t expect this scenario. It didn’t have any loud music fortunately. Yes I get the point David :)

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  5. I'm sorry your birthday dinner was such a disaster. Your son was way more generous that I would have been.That young man wouldn't have gotten any tip from me at all. I would have probably said something not so nice to him as well. I don't hold my tongue as well as I used to....lol I'm glad that you at least got a good desert aftewards

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    1. Thank you Ann :) son had an interesting strategy and when he explained why, it made sense. He did rather save my birthday by suggesting our favorite pastry place. My patience isn’t the greatest these days. I think I must have been in a state of shock at how appalling it was.

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  6. Hello Denise,
    I am sorry to hear about your birthday dinner being such an awful experience.
    I do not like my food or coffee served cold. My hubby would definitely complain and not leave a good tip. It is nice you had a good dessert and coffee at the second place. Take care, have a great day and a happy weekend!

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    1. Thank you Eileen, much appreciated and yes, the second place saved the day :) You take care too and I wish you the same.

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  7. So disappointing. Dining out should always be a treat, birthday or not.

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    1. Couldn’t have put it better myself John, thank you. It was a bit of a shock and we have never before been so disappointed or dissatisfied before.

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  8. Sorry to hear that your birthday meal was ruined by that rude waiter...why gave him the tip? I would probably have a few words with the manager, esp. the steak meal must be quite expensive and esp. it's your birthday. And you didn't even get a gratis birthday cake or something? Geez...

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    1. Thank you for your input Angie :) much appreciated and it was bad all round at that restaurant.

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  9. I am afraid I would have stood up and said, let's go! No way I would have taken that behavior and cold coffee. Shame on that restaurant. I hope you contact the management and send them this post. They need to know.
    There are a couple restaurant review groups on Facebook for our area. I read those reviews and take heed of the advice. We can't afford to waste our money on bad foid and/or bad service. I hate tgat you had such a bad experience, and on your birthday too. That's just sad. At least dessert was a fun experience!

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    1. Thank you Granny Sue, I certainly won’t be recommending the place to anyone. Even if it was a one-off, we will never go back again. Yes, at least it ended on a good note at our favorite pastry place :)

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  10. Look forward, is always my opinion... I hope you can. Next you can maybe laugh about.

    And of course: Happy Birthday to you. Very best wishes too.
    Greetings by Heidrun ❤️

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    1. That’s great advice Erica, and thank you for the birthday wishes. Very much appreciated :)

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  11. How disappointing for you. I would have mentioned the cold food to the manager. The desserts looked absolutely delicious, so pleased you enjoyed them. Belated Happy Birthday to you.

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    1. Thank you my friend :) on reflection I would have mentioned something but we didn’t want to hang around and I wanted out of there in a hurry. Thanks for my birthday wishes, so kind of you.

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  12. Oye. I'm so sorry about the initial birthday out experience but I'm happy it was sweetened up at your last stop! Those desserts look amazing!

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    1. Thank you Ellen, I was very happy with the ending and was able to brush it off :)

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  13. I would have at least told the manager everything you were served was cold. At the end of the meal I likely would have asked the waiter if he was having a bad day. I get your son's point but I would have left the waiter a penny. At least the celebration had a lovely ending.

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    1. Thank you for the advice Sandra, and hopefully it will never happen again, and the favorite part of the evening was ending up at Chateau de Chantilly. It’s a great little place.

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  14. Really terrible place and service, substandard food. Everything costs so much these days, so the food has to be decent. I would have said service and food. I have also said it when something like that happened to me. Luckily you got decent service and dessert at another place.

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    1. Thank you Anne :) it certainly does. On reflection it would have been a gift in an odd sort of way, to tell the manager about our experience. Appreciate your input.

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  15. Happy belated Birthday, Denise! Haha … I absolutely love the quote and the look of the desserts. Wow, that WAS awful service. I would not give this server a tip and I would have expressed some displeasure (pleasantly) to a manager about the food and service. Perhaps even written an online review anonymously. Otherwise, how is he or the establishment going to know they need to improve?

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    1. Thank you Penelope, it certainly was awfully bad, a bit of a shock. That’s good advice.

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  16. Bardzo współczuję . Ja gdy ktoś jest nie miły nie daję napiwki . Życzę wszystkiego co najlepsze z okazji urodzin 😊🍾🍸🍸

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    1. Bardzo dziękuję za życzenia urodzinowe. Dziękuję również za cenne rady – bardzo to doceniam. Życzę wspaniałej dalszej części tygodnia :)

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    1. Very kind of you Christine, thank you so much :)

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  18. I would have asked the waiter to step back a bit; women at the table are asked first! Then explain why coffee is supposed to be warm. If still bad, I would have asked for the manager. If it didn't improve, I'd ask for manager, and explain that you didn't get proper food (hope you don't get sick) and refuse to pay the bill, and explain that the waiter needs more training. K.C. peeps don't tolerate such garbage. We, too have a restaurant showing cold steaks of different cuts in the entrance foyer fridge. They wait to get our order as we order. It's been around since 1938 (Jess 'n Jim's Steakhouse). The steaks don't shrink. I'd call the owner of that bad place, explain what happened, and see if he's willing to offer a redo. He'd better be present if you go again. Good Luck, Linda in Kansas

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    1. Thanks for the great advice Linda and for the good luck :) No, we didn’t get sick thankfully. I am never setting foot back inside that place.

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  19. I am glad it ended well, birthday girl! Just so sad it went so badly.
    I would have sent the coffee back immediately. I think since a tip is To Improve Service, I would not have given one.
    There should be feedback, too. The kid needs to understand how he made you feel. So sorry.

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    1. Awww thank you Jenn, I appreciate that :) and am taking lots of notes should this ever happen again. I doubt we will ever top that experience again.

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  20. Wow, that was incredibly disappointing. I can't believe you paid and didn't say anything.
    It was a bad waiter and a bad kitchen sending out cold food. Oh well. you made the best of it and had a wonderful time afterwards. Did you have something called Dubai Chocolate - it is the new thing with that green and pistachios.

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    1. Yes, that’s how we rolled that day. My two guy’s didn’t want me to hang around any more as they could see how upset I was. Yes, we made the best of it but I have a feeling that will never happen again. And we did have a great ending to the evening. My favorite pastry at the second place is a Dubai Chocolate Croissant. It’s decadent :)

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  21. I would be leaving a bad review on Yelp firstly. I'm so sorry that you had to deal with that.
    When I was younger I would have said nothing but now that I'm older, I would have told the manager everything when he came over. No way would I have remained quiet and a tip, absolutely not. But that's just me.

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    1. Very kind of you Mary, thank you :) If I hadn’t been taken by surprise at this behaviour and so stunned, I might have reacted differently. I am hoping I will never again be put to the test.

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  22. To answer your question, I would probably have told the manager about the cold food and coffee and requested it all be properly heated up.

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    1. Thank you Sandra, I guess all I wanted was to be out of there and away from that rude waiter :)

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  23. Happy Belated Birthday! I would have at the beginning, said could I have another cup of coffee, this one is cold.. If something else came cold, I would have done the same and if the manager asked I would have told him, not in a mad way, but simple truth.. That might help the next person with a birthday if not yours.
    In 1987 we went from breakfast at the Friendly Fisherman, at Johns pass, Mederia Beach Fl... we had eaten breakfast and lunch and dinner there many times, NOT all on the same day ha ha...
    Breakfast came and the toast was black, and cold, bobb eggs were hard as bricks not over easy, mine were supposed to be well-done, no JUICEY stuff and they were to raw to eat. it was a disaster. I did leave a tip, but since my face says everything I think, the manager that rang up as we left, asked was everything alright? I looked at him, and said that was the worst breakfast I have ever been served. I told him how it was and he said.
    I will give you half off.... we never went back. I do know that sometimes it is the cook having a bad day, and if we go back, the food is fine... Food is way to expensive for things like this. I am so glad you went to your happy place and got dessert and hot coffee. Love the coke bottle. I always feel better when I tell a story and since one of my 3 jobs I worked in one week when I moved here to FL, one was a waitress in a restaurant. I lasted 3 months and never took a waitress job again.

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    1. Thanks for the birthday wishes, the good advice and for sharing your experience Sandra :) It is a hard job I know.

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  24. Oh bless you! I am so sorry you had such a TERRIBLE time at that restaurant! I honestly would have done the exact same thing as you. I would have just left and would NEVER DARKEN THEIR DOOR AGAIN! AND I would tell anyone who would listen how terrible it was! I do not think I would have left a very good tip though, he didn't deserve it. Glad you got to go somewhere and have a nice dessert to celebrate your birthday!

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    1. NEVER DARKEN THEIR DOOR AGAIN! I love that, thank you Kay :) Never will I darken their doors again either and this experience was a good lesson learned on what not to do. I have been lucky, this was the first truly bad experience I have ever had, except for that one waiter 30 years ago. I think that’s why my brain shut down, which happens when I am over-the-top upset, which thankfully doesn’t happen like this.

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  25. Me alegra que la pasaras bien. Te mando un beso y te deseo un buen fin de semana.

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    1. Muchas gracias. Te mand un beso y te deseo que sigas teniendo una buena semana :)

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  26. So sorry things did not turn out well ... I would have said something!
    Lovely photographs from Chateau de Chantilly Cafe.

    All the best Jan

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    1. Thank you Jan, if ever there is a next time and I sincerely hope there isn’t, I will know what I should do :) all the best, Denise

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  27. That sounds like a terrible time out and a real downer of a birthday meal. I wouldn't have tipped them, and I would have left too. And decided never to go back. At least your stop for dessert sounds great, and that dessert looks amazing. I hope that was the only terrible part of your birthday.

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    1. Thank you Erika, I appreciate that :) Yes, at least it ended up on a good note as the rest of my birthday went beautifully!

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  28. So sorry that your birthday started out so terrible...Glad you went elsewhere and ended the day on a better note!! Happy Belated Birthday!! Thanks so much for stopping by!!
    Hugs,
    Deb
    Debbie-Dabble Blog

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    1. Very kind of you, thanks so much Debbie :) Much appreciated! Hugs, Denise

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  29. sounds like a flick from "candid camera" or "what would you do"!! such a special night, i wish it could have gone better!! someone owes you a special birthday...one you really deserve!!!!!!!!

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    1. Yes, I should have been looking around for the hidden camera, lol! We will be having a redo sometime. Thanks so much Debbie :)

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  30. Dear Denise, I am so sorry you had to go through that; I have to tell you, I would have just got up and left. That went completely wrong. It’s a good thing your son suggested that café—the one with the delicious desserts for everyone.
    Just put it behind you and never go back there!
    Sending you a big hug, Elke

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    1. Hello Dear Elke, you are very kind, thank you! You give excellent advice for which I am very grateful! :) Sending you a big hug too. Denise

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  31. OH gosh, Denise. That is just AWFUL!!! I would not have been as nice as you. Definitely no tip. And I would have said something to the manager. Not angrily, but I would have said your waiter must be having a bad day and explained what was wrong with the food. Calmly though. Not angrily or anything. Granted, that's what I hope I would do. Actually.... now that I'm thinking about it, Art would have been the one talking to the manager instead of me. His family once operated a mom and pop restaurant, so he knows the manager would have appreciated constructive feedback.

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    1. Thank you Kay and I very much appreciate your sharing :) How interesting that Art’s parents had a restaurant. They and he would have some very interesting stories no doubt.

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  32. How awful! I would have let the manager know all that was wrong.

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    1. Thanks Linda, if the situation ever came up again I have everyone’s wonderful advice to remember :)

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  33. Denise, I know you don't like to complain. I don't either. But recently, Rick and I had a similar experience. The waiters weren't surly when they showed up -- but they rarely showed up. Service was slow, the food was expensive and terrible. We left without saying anything but the more I thought about it, the madder I got and I finally sent an email to the restaurant manager. I almost instantly received a most apologetic reply along with the offer to please return and enjoy dinner and a bottle of wine on the house (which we will do in a couple of weeks). I was shocked, but it was the right thing to do. I listed every flaw sequentially (the hurried staff that never returned, why the food was not good, etc. And, that it was a special occasion.

    It was worth it. I'm so sorry you had this experience on your birthday -- but you had witnesses to it, and I'd mention that (how many at your table, their reactions.) You owe it to yourself -- and the restaurant needs to know too. (You don't have to say the waiter's name but a description of young man and flirting in the kitchen adds credibilty to your story.

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    1. How interesting Jeanie and how wonderful the manager got back to you. I have taken everything you have said into my head and will now be better prepared. Hopefully it won’t be needed :) I don’t want to have to go through that again.

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  34. I used to be a 'server', I also trained servers for years. It seems this person had no service abilities at all. I would have said to the manager that things were not that great. We used to comp the meal if a customer didn't like any little bit.
    The reasoning is: If a customer is unhappy, they will tell 50 friends and those friends will tell 50 more. If you make them happy, the customer will tell 10.

    I have stories about kitchens and restaurants. However, since the guy could turn on the charm for the gal, he could have used some on you guys.

    We have two local places to eat that have the absolute best service I've seen in any rural area. Of course our town has to compete now that Viroqua is considered a Foodie Destination.

    I'd have left if the server ignored me and left him a penny.

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    1. It’s helpful to get all this great advice Val. Thanks so much! :)

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  35. Happy Birthday. Glad you moved to a better cafe for the rest. Great picture too! Happy Happy Birthday to you my friend.

    Since you asked how we'd handle it and in all honesty, we would have left before being served. We've left places before like this and it just works for us.

    Thank you for sharing your story though! Sorry it was for your bday meal.

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    1. Thank you Ivy :) sweet of you to wish me a Happy Birthday. I appreciate your honesty too. It was a very, very strange experience.

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  36. That waiter needs to know the moral of this story is 'You mess with a West Country Lady at your peril'.

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  37. What a shame that the meal was not what you hoped for and the service was so bad. Glad the coffee and dessert were better when you went to a another place that made you much happier..

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    1. Thank you Beverley, it certainly was an experience :) and I am glad too.

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